Seeing others as a gift

Challenges to overcome in living a life of unity and love: some highlights in the journey of Kristina Manullang, a young girl from Medan, Indonesia.

Christmas Eve. My plane had just landed in the Philippines. My destination: Mariapolis Peace, the little town of the Focolare in Tagaytay. There, I was to live with girls from 13 different countries. It wasn’t easy during my first week in that house because I didn’t speak English. Almost every night, I cried in bed but then I remembered I wanted to choose God first in my life, so I would start again and embrace Jesus forsaken [on the cross, Jesus had cried out: “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” ed. note] in my suffering.

Many days passed, and after three weeks I was beginning to feel more relaxed. My life in the house with the other girls gradually became really beautiful and meaningful. I learned many things from the others as we tried to live for one another 24 hours a day. It was a real challenge, even if just in small things. But I found inspiration in the words of Chiara Lubich, the Focolare founder, who said that “There is nothing small if it is done out of love.”

Yet one day I felt so homesick that I wanted to go back to Indonesia. Everything seemed so different here: the food, the weather – Tagaytay is quite windy – and the people. Later I realized that becoming too absorbed in my problems had prevented me from loving the others. I asked Jesus for His help and He made me understand that I had to love always and take the first step. So instead of expecting others to love me, I started to go out of myself to love the other girls by initiating a conversation with them, even though it was still hard for me to speak English. Moreover, I also made acts of love like cleaning the bedroom and the floor, even if I hadn’t been assigned to do so. Little by little, I began to realize that each of my companions was a gift for me. I was acquiring a new mentality, that of Jesus. Putting into practice this life of love, I felt more and more united with others, and experienced a happiness I had never felt before.

Starting again

During my first year, I worked in the kitchen of the Mariapolis Centre where, during weekdays, we cooked for many seminar participants and retreatants. Work there was tiring and I had difficulty communicating with my companions, as most of them were Filipinas and I was the only foreigner. So when they spoke in Tagalog I couldn’t understand them and when they laughed at a joke, I felt out of place and so I just kept quiet. It wasn’t easy to love then in this situation and many times I felt like giving up. However, I understood that no matter how many times I failed, what was important was to start again to love others. So I tried my best to be one with them, learning little by little how to speak in Tagalog and trying to share their joys even if I couldn’t understand everything they said. In a private talk with an experienced friend, I was able to share my struggles to love people at work. Suddenly, assured of God’s love, I rediscovered the peace and a new strength to live every moment for Jesus and for others.

Kristina Manullang

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