A glimpse at Chiara Luce’s last months of her life

In summer 1988 something totally unforeseen happened. While playing tennis one day, Chiara Luce experiences a very sharp pain in her shoulder. At first she did not take much notice and neither does her doctor. However, since the pain persists, the doctor carried out further tests. The verdict: osteogenic sarcoma – one of the most serious and painful forms of cancer and it has already started spreading.

In February 1989, Chiara Luce underwent her first surgery.

On hearing this news, Chiara Luce, after a moment’s silence, accepted the outcome courageously, without tears or rebellion. “I’m young. I’m sure I’ll make it,” she says.

In June 1989, Chiara Luce underwent a secondo surgery. This time, hopes were slim.

She is admitted to hospital many times and her kindness and unselfishness really stand out. Setting aside her own need to rest, she spent time walking around the wards with a drug-dependent girl suffering from serious depression. This meant getting out of bed despite the pain caused by the huge growth on her spine. “I’ll have time to rest later,” she used to say.

While Chiara Luce was in hospital, young and adult friends of the Focolare Movement used to take turns in hospital in order to give her support. The treatment was painful and she wanted to know every detail of her illness. For each new, painful surprise, her offering was firm: “For you, Jesus, if you want it, I want it too!”

One day Chiara Luce wrote: “Jesus sent me this illness at the right moment.”

One of her friends shared: “At first we thought we would visit Chiara Luce to keep her spirits up, however, we soon realized that in fact, we were the ones who needed her. Her life was like a magnet drawing us towards her.” The cancer was spreading mercilessly, but Chiara Luce tried her best to live a normal and happy life.

One of the medical staff said, “Through her smile, and through her eyes full of light, she showed us that death doesn’t exist; only life exists.” She had to undergo surgery twice. The subsequent chemotherapy treatment caused her to lose her hair, which she was very proud of. As each lock of hair fell, she used to say simply, but sincerely, “For you, Jesus”.

In July 1989: the tumour spread quickly. Chiara Luce was not yet 18 years of age when she lost the use of her legs. She told her mother: “I really used to enjoy cycling around.” And her mother replied, “If Jesus has taken away the use of your legs, he will give you wings.”

After some time, Chiara Luce said, “If I had to choose between walking or going to heaven, I would choose going to heaven.”

Slowly slowly, Chiara Luce started having the foreboding of death: “Mum, is it fair to die at 17 years of age?” and her mother replies, “I do not know. I only know that it is important to do God’s will, if this is his plan for you.” Whenever she heard this, Chiara Luce would redouble her efforts to love. So, for example, she gave all her savings to a friend leaving on a humanitarian mission to Africa, saying, “I have everything. I don’t need this anymore.”

Chiara Luce spent her the last months of her life completely immobile in bed: through telephone calls she followed a group of Youth for a United World (Y4UW) in Savona. She also participated in their congresses and activities through messages, postcards and posters, and she tried to spread the spirituality of unity among her friends and school companions. She actually invited many of them for Genfest (an international Youth for a United World gathering, held in Rome in May of 1990). She had the joy of watching the Genfest’90 thanks to a satellite dish antenna (novelty at the time) mounted for the purpose on the roof of her home.

She had always Chiara Lubich’s support and the latter wrote her the following message: “God loves you immensely and wants to penetrate the depths of your soul in order to allow you experience heaven on earth.”

Till the very end, Chiara Luce refused to take morphine, saying: “It reduces my lucidity,” and she added, “and there’s only one thing I can do now: to offer my suffering to Jesus because I want to share as much as possible in his suffering on the cross.”

For more information, visit www.chiaraluce.org